Wondering still...

I don't mind getting older. It is happening gradually enough that I don't notice it...much! Except for the aches that limit me physically at times. I don't mind all that much. But...I don't want to get old in my thinking, you know? I stay connected to young people, alot. They are struggling with the very things I struggled with long ago. They have legitimate concerns.

Getting older has not necessarily given me answers for them. I still agree with a lot of things. I still wonder what my purpose is, what I was meant to be doing. I am still surprised by the simple answers that come my way after years of questioning. I'm still learning how to behave around 'grownups'. I try not to look back too often. Answers lie ahead of me, in God.

One of the things I have learned as I have grown older is that God has all the answers. He is ever before me. When I look back all I see is the destruction I and others I trusted have created. But when I look ahead, not into the future, not that kind of ahead but in front of me, like following someone on the way to somewhere, I see who He is and His perfectness and His solutions for me.

Today, Independence Day, I stayed home all day. Me and my dog. She isn't feeling well, her back hurts.

That is my kind of holiday, no obligations, no having to be anywhere...just home with the sun shining through the window as I attempt to become a blogger and finally get all these thoughts out there. Tomorrow I will go back to the routine but today I am just here and it is good.

I still wonder, though, what is my purpose...funny to say at my age but I really want to get on with the important stuff of God. No more wasting time giving in to fears and frustrations. Just doing what He would have me to do.

I wonder...